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乳がん患者の語り
インタビュー08
インタビュー時の年齢 : 73歳診断時の年齢 : 73歳
概要 : 2001年に乳がんの診断。乳房温存手術、タモキシフェン投与、放射線療法を予定。
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- 不信感、喪失感、徐々に診断を受け入れていったことについて語っている
Well here I am at nearly 74. Much wiser after the event as usual.
If you'd have asked me a fortnight ago to try and explain just how I felt I wouldn't have been able to do it. I'm very angry at myself because I feel I should have known better.
I think if I reflect now back on that fortnight it's, I suppose, a similar thing to a bereavement, where you're going through all the normal things and yet you, as if you're a whole differently.
I have been really cross at myself and then I think I got from that stage to disbelief where I felt if I'd just kept on pushing myself, just do the ordinary every day things, it would probably go away anyway.
I was even stupid enough to put my hand and think maybe it's gone. Well you know very well it hasn't, but you do it.
I'm relieved now that I've got to the stage where I know exactly what is happening. I know that this is only the first stage. I'm quite confident in my mind that although there are so many people with it, you're not on your own.
But I'm quite confident that everything that can be done will be done for me, and that is really reassuring.
